Social media websites and apps are like different personalities, each having their own method of communication, features, and values. We spend every day on these sites, learning their styles and vibes in a way that we’ve come to identify them as people. With the recent craze for astrology, we decided to take our intimate knowledge of social media and decide which star sign each website would have for its sun (we’ll let someone else determine their moons and risings).
Astrological Signs as Social Media Sites
Aries is passionate and confident, facing challenges with bold and direct ambition. Nothing matches the cheery disposition complicated by a quick temper more than Facebook, home of distant relatives commenting “BEAUTIFUL PICTURE, TELL JACKIE HELLO!” and unknown trolls shouting their conspiracy theories on viral posts. Both Aries and Facebook are somewhere you can go when you’re looking for a fight, but can also find upbeat support and positivity for life. Fittingly, Aries is the first sign of the zodiac, and Facebook is largely known as The Social Media Website (sorry, MySpace).
Known for loving luxury and relaxation, Taurus’ can find all of their indulgences matched with Tumblr, a website where users can cater exactly what they see. Whether the goal is an aesthetically-pleasing blog or to browse foodie tags, Tumblr fills a Taurus’ needs. Taurus is often seen as stubborn, and the hive-mindedness of Tumblr comes to mind. But when you’re faced with times of trouble, this pair is ready and willing to help. Both are soothing and dependable, always there to provide what you need. Steadfast and loyal, many people can attest how vital friendship with a Taurus has been to their wellbeing, just like Tumblr being a second, virtual home for a large corner of the internet.
Incorrectly assumed to be two-faced, Geminis are simply social butterflies with a variety of interests. Attention-seeking and creative, meet Instagram. Endless scrolling of thousands of topics—photos, videos, IGTV, stories, a Discover Page… Instagram meets the short attention span of Gemini head-on. Constantly changing passions, interests, or hobbies? Not a problem: just search a hashtag and there are thousands of posts already there for it. And if we’re going to talk about sites that like to try something new, we should remember just how often you can open Instagram to a new (or missing) feature. Gemini is a communicator, all about output, and so is Instagram. Post to your heart’s desire, Gemini (just don’t get too caught up in like counts).
Highly sensitive and self-protective, Cancers are more secretive with their emotions. Rather than focus on publicity like other platforms, Snapchat is inherently more personal. A curated group of people are able to see exactly what Cancer is ready to share, be it through individual Snaps, Group Snaps, or posting to their story (of which there are many). Cancers are known for loyalty and commitment, and if Snapchat’s ever-evolving and adapting user experience doesn’t show commitment, we don’t know what does. Ready to provide with articles, shows, and soon AI shopping, Snapchat and Cancers both go all-out for those they love.
Move over sensitivity, showboating is in town. Leos are creative and theatrical, and performative TikTok matches their performative attitude perfectly. TikTok’s trends are constantly evolving and moving forward, just like the stable and consistent Leo. Every Leo perceives themselves as a celebrity, and that’s exactly who TikTok is for. Every video has the chance to explode in popularity and make any user the center of attention, even if it’s just for 15 seconds. Leos can be difficult when they feel threatened, and so can TikTok (the app is known to take down creator videos or shadowbanning without giving reason). Just like the trending video page, Leos are For You (but really, they’re doing it for the spotlight).
Virgos are known for being logical and systematic, the true workaholic sign (sorry, Capricorn). They’re perfectionists who will hunker down until the work is done. Also governed by Mercury and rooted in communication, Virgo loves to process and understand. When work meets meticulous communication, social media gives LinkedIn. Virgos and LinkedIn are there to help on a practical level, whether that’s giving a solution to a personal problem or delivering the connections you need to move up in the world.
Libras are known for beauty, taste, and balance. Surrounding yourself with the best things with a motivation for winning others over, YouTube and Libra just make sense together. The site is less self-serving than Instagram, which would be the first instinct for Libra. YouTube loves companionship, viewers and creators forming a community together, but sometimes those efforts go too far (as Libra is known to do). Going far for validation is something Libras and YouTube can agree on (how many Libras do you think joined the Cinnamon Challenge?).
Scorpios are misunderstood and intense—and so is VSCO. Largely used for photo editing, there is an entire world of VSCO similar to Instagram, but based more on the aesthetic and less on the public approval. Scorpio can relate, laying low and knowing what they want. Neither Scorpio nor VSCO should be rejected for their underlying motives and interest in their own ego, because at the end of the day they can bring light into the dark if you give them a chance.
No one does nosy like Sagittarius—or like NextDoor. If you’re always interested in knowing what your neighbors are up to, then NextDoor is definitely the app for you. Sagittarius are on a quest for knowledge and thrill, and nothing is as thrilling as reading 30-something people dissect whether someone just has raccoons or a neighborhood teen snuck out last night. As excellent storytellers and known embellishers, the stories you can get from both the people and the app are ones that will never leave you disappointed (though sometimes, they may come off as pretentious).
A little show-boaty, kind of hard-headed, and definitely know-it-alls, Capricorns are undoubtedly the Twitters of the astrological calendar. Capricorns are perceived as professional and stoic, but on the inside, they are wonderfully playful. If you’ve never explored Twitter, you may think of it as off-the-cuff reporting, political conversations, and debates. However, there is definitely a playful sect, commonly referred to as “fandom” or “stan” Twitter. And don’t forget that Capricorns are known to struggle with maintaining a strong work-life balance, which anyone who has closed Twitter only to immediately reopen it can understand. We’re not sure any other app is updating and progressing as constantly as Twitter, matching the can-do attitude of go-getter Capricorn.
Rebel at heart: Aquarius, or social media site Reddit? While both tend to rebel themselves all the way back into being mainstream, both can be recognized for their authentic and free-spirited nature. Aquarians are big, original thinkers, and Reddit is known to be the origin of many popular memes (or the place that thoughts born on other sites find their spotlight). Have you ever noticed how some Reddit frequenters come off as pompous or stubborn? Well, Aquarius is no stranger to that attitude, having a strong conviction that makes it hard for them to change. But in the end, if you love to indulge in the quirky or shocking, you’ll want to keep Aquarius and Reddit in your social (media) circles.
Pisces is constantly torn between fantasy and reality, and if you’ve ever made a Pinterest board, you know how that can be. Pinterest is a site where users visualize their dreams with trendy DIY and fashion projects—which are often way harder than imagined and result in an abandoned project in the corner. But Pisces are easily swallowed by emotion, often using escapism to cope, like making a perfectly stylized Pinterest board of the ideal living room, ignoring the muddy carpet and stained walls of real life’s. However, both incredibly adaptable, Pisces and Pinterest are ideal artists and creatives, inspired and inspiring.
Social Media IRL
We’re not Astrologers here at Online Optimism, but we do have fun poking around the internet and learning about trends, which sometimes includes in-depth discussions of our astrological charts. But one thing we do know is Social Media. If your business could use the Optimistic touch, give our team a call today to talk about the right strategies for your marketing.